Sign with Full Tilt Poker as a “Red Pro” of course. They’ve been on a tear lately, signing everyone from micro-limit grinders douches to this dude. So we figure that since Clonie is gone and Jennifer Harman is pretty much an absentee owner at this point, that Kimberly is the perfect choice for the next female Full Tilt Poker Red Pro. Since Daniel Negreanu is taken now (he’s the girl from PokerStars), this is the perfect opportunity to snatch up some real talent before her stock goes up.

The requirements to get this gig simply can’t be that hard.

Lets take a look:

Full Tilt Poker Red Pro Job Application

[X] Are you hot?

[X] Can you even remotely talk about and/or play poker?

[X] Do the fucktards on Two Plus Two make threads about you that blow up?

[X] Is (your name) available as a Full Tilt screen name?

[X[ Can we (FTP) make a silly ass cartoon avatar of you with big boobs?

You’re hired!